You have your home. You have your workplace. In my case, that’s an office in my home, so maybe I have one and a half spaces. But do you have a third space?
What Is a Third Space?
A third space is where you step outside the roles of “professional” or “family member” and get to engage in something that’s just for you.
It’s where you connect with a different part of yourself.
I hadn’t heard of this concept until I was congratulating a friend on a big win for the soccer team she coaches. She told me how good it felt to have a third space, a place that wasn’t work or home, where she could use her time and talents in a way that felt meaningful.
Where the Idea Comes From
The term “third space” was introduced by sociologist Ray Oldenburg, who imagined:
The first space as home
The second space as work
The third space as where we go to connect and socialize informally
In my travels to Costa Rica, I’ve noticed how, at sunset, the locals head to the beach. A perfect shared public space. A place where they know they’ll run into friends and neighbors and share something simple and beautiful together.
In our modern lives, third spaces often require more intentionality. Many of our communities no longer have the local gathering places that naturally fostered connection. So we have to seek them out through what we enjoy or what we want more of.
What Could Your Third Space Be?
For one friend, it’s coaching soccer, tapping into her college athlete roots.
For another, it’s dancing at local events, joining a creative and joyful community.
- Playing pickleball is a great one these days.
It might be volunteering for a cause you believe in.
Or joining a circle of artists to share what’s inspiring you.
For many of our clients, their weekly accountability group is one of these spaces. We all need a consistent, thoughtful gathering where we can connect with others.
I’m exploring third spaces in my own life.
If you’re like me and open to new third spaces, what’s one thing you’d love to try?
